Urban dictionary definition of Target:

*Department store, competitor to Wal-Mart. Upscale-ness indicated by alternate pronunciation with a French twist on it.

and

*For people who wouldn’t be caught dead at Wal-Mart.

I can admit I shop at both Target AND Wal-Mart. I have to. The Target here doesn’t have a full grocery like the ones back home in Oklahoma. (SO unfair.) So, most of my pantry items are purchased from Wal-Mart. Everything else, Target is my place to kick it.

Today, I took Hola out and about to run errands while his big brother spends some time alone with his Gran Gran and Grandfather. Our last stop was Target. How much easier is it to shop with ONE kid? Especially when the kid can’t say much besides “Hiiiiye! Hiiiiiiye!”"Hiiiiiiyyyeeee!” We, of course, have conversations, but I don’t have to explain to him why we are not going to buy one of the 495 boxes of multi-colored goldfish intentionally put in clear view for all kids to beg their parents to spend $1 on a mini-carton full of fish. (I am not going to mention the bag of goldfish I did buy, (AND OPEN) along with a munckin snap trap to keep Hola busy halfway through our visit.)

ANYwho, I needed a few odds and ends that only Target can fulfill. My first stop was the children’s toy section. Um, can someone please explain to me that there are basically NO toys anywhere to be found? WHAT THE HELL? All I wanted was to check out the selection of Leapster games. (That in itself is a whole other story that I will get to eventually. Filled with dissatisfaction and returns!) There wasn’t even a SECTION of Leapster anything. After pushing the cart up and down most aisle, assuming I’d miss the obvious display of GREEN FROG games, I finally found someone wearing a hot red vest and asked him what the deal was.

He said they were clearing out for CHRISTMAS inventory.

Christmas?

In July?

Wah?

Fine. So, my ONE opportunity to look for a toy for a kid who is not with me failed. Moving on.

Has anyone else had trouble finding the hand sanitizer? It’s like hidden somewhere in the store, but changes on a monthly basis. What gives? Isn’t sanitizer like the hottest thing these days. Shouldn’t it be prominently displayed to maximize their profits? Marketing 101 here.

And what about the Target version of Playtex pearl tampons? They have a box for Regulars. Where’s the Super size? I don’t think the multi-pak is going to do it for me and most other gals. Who needs 82 extra Slender size tampons taking up space under my sink? Help us girls out, will ya?

What else?

Oh, what happened to your Earth’s Best cereal bars? They are a stable in our house with both boys. WHERE DID YOU GO WITH THEM? And why did you replace them with a healthy version of a rice krispie treat bar? Earth’s Best adding yogurt to some krispies doesn’t cut it with my 4 yr old. Case closed.

Also, Can your milk be as cheap as Safeways? It could really save me a trip. Your orange juice is quite a steal. So, can we work on the milk, please? The one with a clear indicator of NO RBsT hormone? Thanks.

Anything you want to add to my rant?

I usually am quite thrilled with most of my trips, but today had a lot of potential with a rather large letdown. And, $77 later, I have no idea what I bought and I am sure I could have lived a  most fulfilled life without each and every item. Well, everything besides the toilet paper.

e

Ever since returning from our beach vacation, (which I may write about someday and actually provide photos as documentation) I have done nothing but “be.” It’s easy to do when your husband leaves town on business the morning after you arrive home from a week away.

The house WAS clean. It truly was, but when you add every bag that was IN the car, into the hallway, then unload all of the groceries and kitchen items into the kitchen, AND try to feed the kids dinner and get them to bed for ONCE in their lives by their bedtime, it makes for the makings of a HUGE mess.

(Why oh why does every other word have to be SO BIG! It’s as if you didn’t get my inflections if I didn’t add them there. The next thing you’ll know I’ll be adding italicized words out the wazzoo. I’m getting excited just thinking about it.)

Luckily, my mom, who I love dearly, has come to hang with us the past 24 hours, which now is turning into 48. Hey, I think she is almost at the point of exhaustion keeping up with these kiddos. Not so much keeping up with them, it’s just that they want her attention all the time and at the same time. It totally works for me, though. I can actually get some work done around here. So far? Towels. I have washed 234 towels. Next up, kids clothes and diapers. Otherwise, they’d be wearing last years fashions. ha.

So, on that note, I will leave you with a pic of us doing nothing. Well, Hola and me. I am not sure where Rt was at the time. Oh, that’s right. He was playing his new Leapster video game I bought him before our road trip. (BEST idea EVER, but of course, it came with it’s own drama. That’s my next post.)

e

p.s. (Has anyone else noticed my nickname for my first born is also verbiage for Re-tweeting on Twitter? Might have to figure out another name for him. Any ideas?)

Sorry I haven’t been on top of my Feed Me Friday’s posts. Posting anything on Friday this summer has had its disadvantages. We have been out of town more than we have been in town, it seems. And we’re doing it again. This time, we’re headed to the beach.

Too bad I am feeling the pressure to pack all of us in one tiny red bow before we head off. It makes me tired just thinking about it. Like this.

I, too, could probably fall asleep in my high chair, if I only had a high chair.

We are very excited to spend some quality time together, just the 4 of us, at one of hubs favorite places to vacation when he was a little tyke. Aptos! (Santa Cruz)

I can say I am going to be just as tired when I return trying to keep my paws on an almost 15 month old all week long ESPECIALLY at the beach.

In the same breath, I am really looking forward to it.

e

Back in 2002, when hubs and I got married, we registered at the typical places, Macy’s, Crate and Barrell, and Williams-Sonoma. We even registered at Pottery Barn, just to give everyone who was invited a selection of places.

Plus, in Oklahoma, one major city (of the two) didn’t have a Crate and Barrell, and there are no Macy’s to be found in the entire state. (I know. Way lame.) Since half of our wedding guests were Okies and the wedding was actually going to be in Oklahoma City, it made since to register wherever we could.

The only place that felt odd to register for necessities was Pottery Barn. I am not sure what exactly was the issue, but zapping decorative items (over must-haves) just seemed bizarre. No matter my weirdness, I made my way through the store with much delight.

We didn’t get too many things from Pottery Barn in the end, which was fine. Our entire kitchen was taken care of, and that was what mattered most. BUT, we did end up with TWO blue, chenille, square, decorative, goose-down pillows for our bed, or our couch. Basically, wherever they landed, they were ours.

I think for the first two years, those pillows resided on our bed. Everyday, they were placed at the front of the pillow line and then at night, they were dumped onto our floor.

Until…..

I was pregnant with Rt.

I used to get up in the night multiple times to pee. Every time I came back to bed, all I could hear was hubs breathing. Yes, it’s one of those things that has to happen, but come on, sleep was WAY more important here. I needed it and he was keeping me from it.

So, in order not to kick him out of the room for MAKING NOISE, I took one of those blue, chenille, square, decorative, goose-down pillows and placed it over my ear while lying on my left side. (The assumed position of a pg girl while sleeping. Good for blood flow.)

And that is where the love affair began.

You couldn’t see me, but I was in there, and I was happy. I couldn’t hear anything topical, but if a louder noise was made, it got my attention, WHICH would be good since we were about to have a baby that made NOISE and stuff in the night.

So, when was that? Beginning of 2004? What’s the date now? Summer, 2009?

WOW, 5 years with a pillow on my head.

Sometimes, while traveling, I would forget my lovely square ear plug. It was pure torture trying to get any other sort of  pillow to stay on my head, let alone provide that perfect suction to keep out the sounds of breathing/snoring babies.

So, when we recently went to Napa to celebrate our anniversary (7 years!) and attended a college friend’s wedding, blue, chenille, square, decorative, goose-down pillow was in tow.

(See? Here we are in Napa! Look how happy I was knowing my pillow was back at the hotel waiting for me!)

The wine was fantastic. The alone time was well-needed. And the wedding? Absolutely lovely. And all of a sudden the weekend was over. And after we left, it was left.

Behind.

At the Travelodge. (group wedding discount. Not because we adored the 4 x 4 sq ft thing they called a pool in the parking lot.)

I am quite distraught, (QUITE!) but also somewhat relieved I still have one more pillow in my arsenal. If not, I’d be in my car two weeks ago perusing the aisles of PB looking for a new best friend.

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Anyone else have any bedtime rituals/issues? Or am I the only kook in the night?

e

I own an ipod.

For 5 years, in fact.

When I lived in LA, I worked for the Cartoon Network. My crazy-ass boss gave me one for my birthday. (How freaking cool is that?)  It was pink to boot!

Hubs uploaded a trillion songs and began using it more than I did, but since it was pink, he decided he needed to look into buying one for himself.

Ever since then, there has been not ONE song uploaded to that puppy.

Which means,

I have never purchased, nor uploaded ONE itune to my ipod EVER.

The concept is great, of course, but it truly does not fit into my life.

(I STILL BUY CD’s PEOPLE!!)

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Reasons why I am not an Ipod uber-user:

1) I spend all day with my kids. Therefore, I am not able to plug in and drift off into song when one child might be screaming he’s stuck in a tight spot or under something heavy.

2) When I go to the gym I usually take some sort of class. Pilates, Yoga, or Piloga. If I don’t, I do take my headphones, but I use them to plug into the bike to watch something distracting on TV.

3) While driving in my car, I truly enjoy listening to the radio. When hubs is in the car, we do use the ipod, but only for longer trips, etc.

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Honestly, I have no idea what I have done with my charger. Hell, I really don’t know where my ipod is at the moment. I WISH I was into more. Hell, I have spent most of my life post-college working in the internet/production world. You would think technology would be coming out of my eyeballs.

I guess it used to. Just not anymore.

Maybe when it really matters to me, I’ll find it and make my first purchase.

e